The word most learners reach for is 对不起 (duìbuqǐ) — a sincere “sorry” that fits a genuine mistake. But it isn’t what locals say for every little bump and interruption.
Saying sorry in Chinese is really about matching the apology to the moment — a light 不好意思 for small slips, a formal 抱歉 in writing, and clear ways to own a real mistake. This guide covers the natural ways to say sorry in Chinese — tap any phrase to hear it spoken by a native voice, and use the flashcards to make them stick.
10 ways to say sorry in Chinese
对不起 works for a real apology — but there are many ways to say sorry in Chinese, and the right one matches the situation. Tap 🔊 on each.
How to respond to an apology
When someone says sorry to you, here’s how to put them at ease.
A warm 没关系 (méi guānxi) is the standard, reassuring reply — it tells the other person all is forgiven. For something truly minor, 没事 (méi shì) works too.
The neutral tone in 对不起
In 对不起, the middle 不 isn’t said with its usual falling tone — it becomes a light, toneless syllable: duì·bu·qǐ, slipped in quickly between 对 and 起. Many learners over-stress it as a hard “bù”, which sounds unnatural. (The 思 in 不好意思 goes light the same way: bù hǎo·yi·si.)
This soft, unstressed syllable is the neutral tone, and it’s everywhere in natural Mandarin. Don’t force it — listen to the audio and copy the quick, soft rhythm.
In China, a quick, sincere 对不起 matters more than a long explanation — over-explaining can sound like making excuses. And for the small stuff (bumping someone, squeezing past), locals say 不好意思, not 对不起. Save 对不起 for when you’ve genuinely done wrong.
Which sorry, when?
| Situation | Say | Why |
|---|---|---|
| A small slip (bumping, interrupting) | 不好意思 | Light and everyday |
| A genuine mistake | 对不起 | Sincere and standard |
| Formal or in writing | 抱歉 | Polite and professional |
| Owning a fault | 我错了 | Takes responsibility |
| Replying to an apology | 没关系 | The standard “it’s okay” |
Common mistakes to avoid
The little slips that trip up beginners saying sorry in Chinese — and the natural fix for each.
✕对不起 for tiny slips
For bumping someone or squeezing past, 对不起 sounds too heavy — a light 不好意思 (bù hǎoyìsi) is what locals say.
✕A hard “bù” in 对不起
The middle 不 is a light, neutral syllable — duì·bu·qǐ. Stressing it as a full “bù” sounds unnatural.
✕Mixing up 不好意思 and 没关系
One apologises (不好意思 = “sorry”), the other forgives (没关系 = “it’s okay”) — don’t swap them.
✕Leaving an apology unanswered
When someone says sorry, a quick 没关系 (méi guānxi) reassures them and closes the moment.
Quick check
1. For gently bumping into someone, the natural choice is…
2. How do you reply to an apology?
3. Which is the more formal “apologies”?
FAQs
Smooth it over — then keep the conversation going
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